We’ve never been of fan of fakery.
Fake banana flavour.
Fake O…. well, let’s not go there.
But, we are a fan of breaking our own rules. And that means embracing the 'fakery' when life throws an unexpected “Oh F***! I-have-to-put-on-a-bikini?” moment. Sometimes you gotta fake-it-till-ya-make-it.
Here are 3 ways you can get yourself into a bikini quicker than you can say "but-Anna-I'm-not-ready!"
1. Fake Tans
A good fake tan will shake those scales off your pins and breathe some colour into you like a fire breathing dragon from G.O.T. Result? You'll feel like the Mother of all Dragons ready to SLAY.
2. Fake C’s
Ahhh…padded cups. God’s saving grace to the wee-chested ladies amongst us who get to rock it with the their big-breasted-sistas (we hear-ya, girl! Get a feel for our padded cups here). Removable padding lets you fake it, even if you won’t ever make it to the big-boob league. And hey, that’s A-ok!
3. Fake confidence.
Insta babes flaunt it like there ain’t no tomorrow. You know the type. "Perfect" hair, "perfect" body. They ooze confidence like cheese dripping out the side of your lunchtime toastie. And if they can fake it, then we sure as heck can too! So, sprinkle that *I-am-solid-gold* dust and shimmer across that sand like Pammy Anderson because the only Bae-watch you oughta be doing is on you, Beauty!
We may not have Pammys iconic red swimsuit, but we do have the next best thing.
Now getcha getcha freak kini on,